Hehe..

Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her and urging her to get back into the world. Finally, Anna said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, "I have someone for you to meet."

So they met and it was an immediate hit. They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend in a romantic motel. Their first night there, she undressed as he did. There she stood nude, except for a pair of black lacy panties, he was in his birthday suit.

Looking her over, he asked, " Why the black panties ? "

She replied: " My breasts you can fondle, my body is yours to explore, but down there I am still in mourning."

He knew he was not getting lucky that night. The following night was the same--she stood there wearing the black panties, and he was in his birthday suit--but now he was wearing a black condom.

She looked at him and asked: "What's with the black condom?"

He replied, " I want to offer my deepest condolences."

Review:

My Boyfriend is a Twat

As reviewed by Rachel North at Amazon.co.uk:

Zoe's multi-award winning blog about her life with her boyfriend and three children is compulsive daily reading for thousands of people. You've got to love a woman who thinks the kitchen is somewhere you pass through in order to get another bottle of red wine from the garage.

Now she's published the whole saga as a book so even more people can enjoy her witty writing about life with a man who adores her, and whom she clearly loves dearly - but who frequently makes her want to curl up with embarassment or just throw crockery, such is his blokey ability to strike up immediate and lengthy conversations with absolutely anyone, especially workmen paid by the hour to get on with jobs, dress exclusively in donated T shirts turned insideout to cover the splatter-marks and stains, snore like a widerbeest with a head cold, fill the fridge with empty jars and stuff the house with more gadgetry than Dixons sale. But he does all the cooking, and he makes her laugh. And without him, this marvellous book would not exist, which would be a great shame, especially as we're nearing Christmas.

Faithfully recording his every foible and bon mot for posterity, Zoe has produced a book that will provoke screams of laughter and nods of recognition from anyone who lives with, loves or is thinking of adopting a of their own. ( Reviewers beware: Amazon won't let you say the word in the title in your review. Yes, I know, it's stupid.)

I could go on, but I won't. Buy the book, it's fab . (And buy it before your mates do, so you can pass off the funny stories about the Tw@t and his hilarious utterances as your own down the pub. Some of the things he has said and done are surely destined to become legend).

--- Anyone wants to get me the book for christmas?---

Fergie..Fergie..

Whoot whoot. BEP was awesome. Me being the rule abiding concer goer opted to leave my cam at home. Fearing they might confiscate it and keep it in some shitty locker til the concert ends but ai yohhhh... Nobody cared! Such a waste lah. So close to the stage some more. Aiya. Nehmind. Win some lose some. Free tix so can't complain.

Fergie as usual was Fergilicious. How hot can a girl's bod be huh!! One handed flips... Super hot abs. Sheesh. Will.i.am was super suave lah.. Hehe..

Ok. I'm still over the moon of catching them live.

You Gave Me Your Word....

but you cheat my feelings...

Wahhh lauuu ehh!!!

Happiness is in the Form of My Pink IC..

Raya weekend as usual was very noisy and hectic. It was nice meeting everyone and laughing and just being merry.

My favourite moment was yesterday...

As you recall, two weeks ago, I blogged about losing some things. Yesterday I planned for today:-

• Send zumsteg off at the airport
• Head down to ICA to get replacement done

But I got a call from his cousin asking if I lost my IC. I thought he was just being an ass but waheyyyy..

"Kawan kerja aku jumpa kau punya card holder dalam teksi. "
Translation: "My colleague found your card holder in a cab."

Can you just imagine!!! 2 weeks of waiting and just when I was about to accept my fate and fork out the money to get a replacement.... of all things to happen... Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Imagine.. My cards were just lying there in that cab for 2 weeks!!! Agaknya pakcik drebar gi holiday. Sebab tu tak drive 2 minggu eh? But nvm... I just very very happpyyyyyy!!

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! To you! and you and you!

To My Friends..

Very Random I Know...

Yeay yeay.. 2 more days... My little Ms Cranky has not come by so I've not missed a single day of fasting yet.. Last Saturday, I got meself a black leather Purcell for $30. Then yesterday I finally bought my raya shoes. Then today I went to the Metro sale at Expo during lunch time to look for my bag but nothing nice. I ended up buying myself an orange comforter set for my room.. Woo.. So fun.. Then later today I have to go for class to hand in my assignment. Yup with my huge comforter set in tow. Hahaha. Oh oh and you I'm going for Black Eye Peas.. My hump My hump... My lovely little hump.... Free tixs again!! Weee.. Ok lah.. Bye.

10.10...

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Happy Anniversary!

Sigh..

They choked..


Haz!! They choked again!!

Anyway yesterday was a first. Many many change of plans saw me watching Balls of Fury at Vivo by myself. Laughing shyly in a cinema all by yourself when you're surrounded by people in groups was kinda funny. So I was laughing ay myself mostly. Heh.

Hah!

England bloody beat Aussie on penalties.. What the bloody hell is new??

cowards.. bleargh..

One of those days..

Yesterday was one day which I hope I do not have to relive again.

First was forgetting my booklet when I have already reminded myself time and time again to bring it along. I went all the way home during lunch just to get that settled.

Then I screwed up my prac again. Even though I was fine during my warm up.

And lastly the mother of all screw ups.. I lost my card holder. Just 3 cards inside but 3 very important cards. I whined and I cried but they did not reappear. Retraced my steps and sat there for hours. Was thinking what needs to be done. Then was reminded that I had this coming with my stubborness of keeping things easily accessible. That just made me feel more pathetic. But yeah I guess I really had it coming.

Was so tired when I got home. Keep dreaming that someone found my cards and returned it to me. Sigh. Can . Dreams . Come . True ?

Anyway, called the cab company in case I droppped it in the cab I took. Called my bank to block my cards. And I've just made a police report just in case.

Today I'm tired. Very tired to the brink of me feeling like I have no energy to fast. Just feel like dropping my head down on the table and just blank out my brains away for the day.

So Excited!!

New Zealand team for NZL v FRA IRB Rugby World Cup quarter-final match at Millennium Stadium in Cardiff on Saturday.

New Zealand:
1 Tony Woodcock
2 Anton Oliver
3 Carl Hayman
4 Keith Robinson
5 Ali Williams
6 Jerry Collins
7 Richie McCaw (c)
8 Rodney So'oialo
9 Byron Kelleher
10 Dan Carter
11 Sitiveni Sivivatu
12 Luke McAlister
13 Mils Muliaina
14 Joe Rokocoko
15 Leon MacDonald

Replacements:
16 Keven Mealamu
17 Neemia Tialata
18 Chris Jack
19 Chris Masoe
20 Brendon Leonard
21 Nick Evans
22 Isaia Toeava

Batal Puasa Saya..

Sigh...

Your Royal Hawtness

How can they look so good... How? How? How??!!